1 00:00:01,600 --> 00:00:04,066 [Synclaire laughing] 2 00:00:06,100 --> 00:00:08,700 ‐ Yeah. Here we are. ‐ Yay. 3 00:00:08,766 --> 00:00:10,666 Crossing the threshold into the humble abode 4 00:00:10,733 --> 00:00:13,600 of Overton and Synclaire Jones, the early years. 5 00:00:13,666 --> 00:00:16,800 ‐ Mmm. ‐ Mmm. 6 00:00:16,866 --> 00:00:19,166 Man, come on. Can you not do this every time? 7 00:00:19,233 --> 00:00:22,033 I'm luggin' 40 pounds of trolls here. 8 00:00:22,100 --> 00:00:24,466 Alright, alright. Ease up, now. 9 00:00:24,533 --> 00:00:25,900 We're newlyweds. 10 00:00:25,966 --> 00:00:28,733 Facin' our brave, new world together. 11 00:00:28,800 --> 00:00:32,233 Oh, stop the drama. You're down one flight of stairs. 12 00:00:33,500 --> 00:00:34,866 (Trip) 'Ah.' 13 00:00:34,933 --> 00:00:36,800 ‐ 'Hey!' ‐ Ooh. 14 00:00:37,433 --> 00:00:38,433 [grunting] 15 00:00:39,766 --> 00:00:41,500 You might wanna wipe off his leg, uh.. 16 00:00:41,566 --> 00:00:43,633 A dog got a little friendly out in the alley. 17 00:00:43,700 --> 00:00:45,700 Oh, Trip, thank you so much for pitching in. 18 00:00:45,766 --> 00:00:47,686 I take back all the nasty things I said about you 19 00:00:47,710 --> 00:00:50,533 moving into my old room and stealing all of my friends. 20 00:00:50,600 --> 00:00:51,866 My goodness. 21 00:00:51,933 --> 00:00:55,100 Oh, oh. I said that behind your back, didn't I? 22 00:00:55,166 --> 00:00:56,400 Sorry. 23 00:00:56,466 --> 00:00:59,333 Oh God, this place is depressing. 24 00:00:59,400 --> 00:01:01,306 Whoo, you sure the old bag who lived here 25 00:01:01,373 --> 00:01:02,906 died of a heart attack? 26 00:01:02,973 --> 00:01:06,406 Maybe she just killed herself. Ooh! Yuck. 27 00:01:06,473 --> 00:01:08,373 Hey, don't crack on Miss Porchnick. 28 00:01:08,439 --> 00:01:09,873 Kinda hard keepin' the house cheery 29 00:01:09,940 --> 00:01:11,873 when you're hooked up to a iron lung. 30 00:01:14,406 --> 00:01:16,740 So this is how Regine sees the world. 31 00:01:19,006 --> 00:01:20,640 Those are called feet, Max. 32 00:01:20,706 --> 00:01:22,973 Oh, you know, those things that Kyle used 33 00:01:23,040 --> 00:01:24,906 to walk out of your life. 34 00:01:26,206 --> 00:01:28,540 Oh. Oh, and those feet are just nasty. 35 00:01:28,606 --> 00:01:31,306 Eh, one word, sister! Pedicure! 36 00:01:32,706 --> 00:01:35,573 ♪ We are living ♪ ♪ Hey ♪ 37 00:01:35,640 --> 00:01:37,240 ♪ Single ♪ 38 00:01:37,306 --> 00:01:39,840 ♪ Ooh in a 90s kind of world ♪ 39 00:01:39,906 --> 00:01:41,840 ♪ I'm glad I got my girls ♪ 40 00:01:41,906 --> 00:01:43,306 ♪ Oh keep your head up ♪ ♪ What? ♪ 41 00:01:43,373 --> 00:01:44,749 ♪ Keep your head up ♪ ♪ That's right ♪ 42 00:01:44,773 --> 00:01:46,706 ♪ Whenever this life get tough you gotta fight ♪ 43 00:01:46,773 --> 00:01:49,040 ♪ With my home girls standing to my left and my right ♪ 44 00:01:49,106 --> 00:01:50,940 ♪ True blue ♪ ♪ It's tight like glue ♪ 45 00:01:51,006 --> 00:01:53,573 ♪ We are living ♪ ♪ Check check check it out ♪ 46 00:01:53,640 --> 00:01:54,840 ♪ Single ♪ ♪ Do what you want ♪ 47 00:01:54,864 --> 00:01:57,173 ♪ No free position ♪ 48 00:01:57,240 --> 00:01:59,946 ♪ Ha‐aa ♪ 49 00:02:04,413 --> 00:02:06,246 ‐ Khadijah, check it out. ‐ Huh? 50 00:02:06,313 --> 00:02:07,646 The Phoenix Suns are in town. 51 00:02:07,713 --> 00:02:09,413 Now, what do you say, we go down and hang 52 00:02:09,480 --> 00:02:12,946 with your buddy, Cedric Ceballos and his long‐legged friends? 53 00:02:14,446 --> 00:02:16,280 ‐ Oh, wow. Suns in town? ‐ Yes. 54 00:02:16,346 --> 00:02:18,213 Uh, Max, Kyle's gone a few weeks 55 00:02:18,279 --> 00:02:20,880 and already you are trampin' around locker rooms? 56 00:02:20,946 --> 00:02:23,046 Have you no shame? I'll answer that. 57 00:02:23,113 --> 00:02:25,680 Not a damn bit. 58 00:02:25,746 --> 00:02:28,780 Maxine Shaw does not pine over the past. 59 00:02:28,846 --> 00:02:32,013 But if I can help you satisfy your thing 60 00:02:32,080 --> 00:02:34,313 for Ced the teddy bear.. 61 00:02:34,380 --> 00:02:35,646 Then everybody's the winner. 62 00:02:35,713 --> 00:02:38,346 What thing? I don't have no thing. 63 00:02:38,413 --> 00:02:39,713 He is just a friend. 64 00:02:39,780 --> 00:02:42,346 A friend you flirt with every time you interview him. 65 00:02:42,413 --> 00:02:43,913 I do not flirt with him. 66 00:02:43,980 --> 00:02:46,580 I just use my people skills to get him to open up. 67 00:02:48,180 --> 00:02:50,420 Okay, it doesn't hurt that I carry a little tape recorder 68 00:02:50,480 --> 00:02:52,946 in my cleave, you see.. 69 00:02:53,013 --> 00:02:55,313 ‐ Khadijah! ‐ What? 70 00:02:55,380 --> 00:02:58,313 God did not bless you with boobage.. 71 00:03:00,280 --> 00:03:03,620 So that you could carry office supplies. 72 00:03:05,986 --> 00:03:08,320 Girl, you better use them things to get a date. 73 00:03:11,353 --> 00:03:14,053 Well, he is kind of sexy. 74 00:03:14,120 --> 00:03:17,686 I guess, I could, uh, approach him about a follow‐up interview. 75 00:03:17,753 --> 00:03:19,986 Uh, no. No, you will not, alright? 76 00:03:20,053 --> 00:03:21,386 That's the old Khadijah. 77 00:03:21,453 --> 00:03:22,853 Now, the new Khadijah 78 00:03:22,920 --> 00:03:26,086 needs to put down the notepad and ask the brother out. 79 00:03:26,153 --> 00:03:28,020 The new Khadijah needs to get some 80 00:03:28,086 --> 00:03:29,753 and tell us all the dirty details. 81 00:03:31,886 --> 00:03:35,020 The new Khadijah sound like a big‐mouthed hooker. 82 00:03:36,453 --> 00:03:38,013 (Max) 'Now, come on, Khadijah, hurry up.' 83 00:03:38,053 --> 00:03:40,013 Gotta get in there before they wash the sweat off. 84 00:03:40,037 --> 00:03:40,820 ‐ Press. ‐ Alright. 85 00:03:40,886 --> 00:03:42,120 ‐ Press. ‐ Alright. 86 00:03:42,186 --> 00:03:43,553 ‐ Excuse me. ‐ Yes. Yes, sir. 87 00:03:43,620 --> 00:03:45,953 This looks like a video rental card. 88 00:03:47,286 --> 00:03:50,220 Excuse me, this is my writing partner. 89 00:03:50,286 --> 00:03:51,966 And I'm not goin' in that room without her. 90 00:03:51,990 --> 00:03:54,057 The exit is to the left. 91 00:03:54,986 --> 00:03:56,786 See you later, Max. 92 00:03:56,853 --> 00:03:58,920 Oh, w‐w‐wait, oh.. 93 00:03:58,986 --> 00:04:00,096 (Cedric) 'Oh, I knew we had the game won' 94 00:04:00,120 --> 00:04:01,426 when I saw Spike Lee courtside 95 00:04:01,493 --> 00:04:03,026 crying in his popcorn. 96 00:04:03,093 --> 00:04:04,793 So you're happy with the win even though 97 00:04:04,860 --> 00:04:06,893 you didn't score a single free throw all night? 98 00:04:06,960 --> 00:04:09,893 Oh, you'll have to excuse me. My coach just arrived. 99 00:04:11,860 --> 00:04:14,960 Hiya, girl. How you doin'? 100 00:04:15,026 --> 00:04:17,593 You here for some interviews or just peep out a little flesh? 101 00:04:17,660 --> 00:04:20,160 [sighs] Um, little bit of both. 102 00:04:20,226 --> 00:04:21,960 Hmm, well, I'm available for a little 103 00:04:22,026 --> 00:04:23,660 one‐on‐one tomorrow night. 104 00:04:23,726 --> 00:04:25,960 Alright, well, how about dinner? 105 00:04:26,026 --> 00:04:28,660 Khadijah James, did you just ask me out? 106 00:04:28,726 --> 00:04:30,060 Depends. You sayin' yes? 107 00:04:30,126 --> 00:04:32,526 Umm, yeah, if you're askin'. 108 00:04:32,593 --> 00:04:34,059 Alright. 109 00:04:34,126 --> 00:04:35,526 And just make sure you wear that. 110 00:04:35,593 --> 00:04:37,059 Okay. 111 00:04:38,759 --> 00:04:40,559 Now you still have that little crazy roommate? 112 00:04:40,583 --> 00:04:42,526 The one who had me sign that Styrofoam wig‐head. 113 00:04:42,593 --> 00:04:44,093 ‐ Oh. ‐ 'What was her name? 114 00:04:44,160 --> 00:04:46,626 ‐ Max. ‐ That's Regine. 115 00:04:46,693 --> 00:04:49,160 Max is the sweet one. 116 00:04:49,226 --> 00:04:52,160 Oh, hello. Oh, okay, wait a minute. 117 00:04:52,226 --> 00:04:54,493 [laughing] Hey, partner. 118 00:04:55,926 --> 00:04:58,160 (male ♫1) 'Ow!' 119 00:04:58,226 --> 00:05:00,766 Well, if you don't like it, cowboy, snap me back. 120 00:05:02,100 --> 00:05:03,500 [knock on door] 121 00:05:05,433 --> 00:05:07,733 Oh, hello. I'm looking for Mary Porchnick. 122 00:05:07,800 --> 00:05:09,800 She does live here, doesn't she? 123 00:05:09,866 --> 00:05:11,866 Lives? 124 00:05:11,933 --> 00:05:13,866 Uh, uh, uh.. 125 00:05:15,166 --> 00:05:17,966 Well, well‐well, my name is Mr‐Mr. McLay. 126 00:05:18,033 --> 00:05:20,366 I'm a, I'm a friend of hers. 127 00:05:20,433 --> 00:05:23,166 ‐ Is she up and about? ‐ Well, uh.. 128 00:05:23,233 --> 00:05:26,933 Uh, uh, well, she‐she‐she's‐she's moved on. 129 00:05:27,000 --> 00:05:29,066 M‐moving, moving, m‐moving on. 130 00:05:29,133 --> 00:05:30,866 Uh, wh‐wh‐where to? 131 00:05:32,200 --> 00:05:34,800 A better place. 132 00:05:34,866 --> 00:05:38,466 Oh, fiddlesticks. I'm‐I'm only in town for a couple of days. 133 00:05:38,533 --> 00:05:40,666 And I‐I‐I'm desperate to see her. 134 00:05:40,733 --> 00:05:43,766 Uh, will she, will she be around later? 135 00:05:43,833 --> 00:05:46,300 In one form or another. 136 00:05:46,366 --> 00:05:48,500 Oh, tha‐thank you. Uh, I‐I'll be back. 137 00:05:48,566 --> 00:05:51,600 And, uh, don't tell her. 138 00:05:51,666 --> 00:05:55,633 The old bird just loves surprises. 139 00:05:55,700 --> 00:05:57,833 And she got a pretty good one last month. 140 00:05:58,800 --> 00:06:01,573 Oh, yeah. Oh, buh‐bye. 141 00:06:01,640 --> 00:06:03,140 Uh, who was that, babe? 142 00:06:03,206 --> 00:06:05,073 Obie, it was this sweet old man. 143 00:06:05,140 --> 00:06:07,373 He was, he was looking for Mary Porchnick. 144 00:06:07,440 --> 00:06:08,373 ‐ Oh. ‐ Oh.. 145 00:06:08,440 --> 00:06:09,606 A‐a‐and I think I gave him 146 00:06:09,673 --> 00:06:10,753 the impression that she was 147 00:06:10,777 --> 00:06:12,973 living and breathing and would be here later. 148 00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:15,473 Oh. Oh, my. 149 00:06:15,540 --> 00:06:16,940 Well, uh, don't fret, baby. 150 00:06:17,006 --> 00:06:19,540 Uh, when he comes back, I'll break the news to him. 151 00:06:19,606 --> 00:06:21,940 See, look here, girl. We're a team now. 152 00:06:22,006 --> 00:06:23,406 And if one of us fumbles the ball 153 00:06:23,473 --> 00:06:26,140 the other one picks it up, runs it to the end zone 154 00:06:26,206 --> 00:06:29,273 and does the victory dance in front of the whole dog pound. 155 00:06:29,340 --> 00:06:31,140 Hm. 156 00:06:31,206 --> 00:06:33,640 You still miss the Browns, don't you? 157 00:06:33,706 --> 00:06:35,706 Like a toddler misses the nipple. 158 00:06:43,506 --> 00:06:45,040 (Synclaire) Okay! 159 00:06:45,106 --> 00:06:47,373 Cinderella's ready for the ball. 160 00:06:47,440 --> 00:06:49,773 [chuckles] Cinderella's havin' second thoughts 161 00:06:49,840 --> 00:06:53,173 about these nose bleed stilettos. 162 00:06:53,240 --> 00:06:56,673 Nose bleeds go away. Loneliness is forever. 163 00:06:58,173 --> 00:07:00,040 He's not even gonna see my feet anyway. 164 00:07:00,106 --> 00:07:01,586 He's gonna be too busy lookin' at this 165 00:07:01,610 --> 00:07:04,046 sweat moustache over my upper lip. 166 00:07:04,113 --> 00:07:06,580 Just keep dabbin' it with the bread. You'll be fine. 167 00:07:09,113 --> 00:07:10,980 What is wrong with me? 168 00:07:11,046 --> 00:07:12,913 Oh, Khadijah, you look beautiful. 169 00:07:12,980 --> 00:07:14,346 Why are you so nervous? 170 00:07:14,413 --> 00:07:16,146 I'll tell you why. 171 00:07:16,213 --> 00:07:18,213 Old girl is out of practice. 172 00:07:18,280 --> 00:07:21,080 Hasn't had a serious date in months. 173 00:07:21,146 --> 00:07:23,580 Regine, you been tellin' my business? 174 00:07:23,646 --> 00:07:27,013 Khadijah, men have a sixth sense about this sort of thing. 175 00:07:27,080 --> 00:07:29,713 I mean, we can feel the desperation. 176 00:07:29,780 --> 00:07:31,713 And I gotta tell you, it's a real turn off. 177 00:07:33,046 --> 00:07:34,280 ‐ What? ‐ Alright, that's it. 178 00:07:34,346 --> 00:07:35,346 I'm not goin'. 179 00:07:35,380 --> 00:07:37,813 Let's get somethin' straight, Ira. 180 00:07:37,880 --> 00:07:41,446 You are a man living with women. Okay? 181 00:07:41,513 --> 00:07:44,780 There'll be moments when you really don't belong. 182 00:07:46,713 --> 00:07:49,413 This is two of those moments put together. 183 00:07:49,480 --> 00:07:50,580 Oh, I‐I understand. 184 00:07:50,646 --> 00:07:52,880 You know, I‐I grew up with, uh, three sisters. 185 00:07:52,946 --> 00:07:55,146 I mean, you know, so let me go on and get up out of here 186 00:07:55,170 --> 00:07:58,546 before one of y'all start chasin' me with a hot comb. 187 00:07:58,613 --> 00:08:00,813 Look, when Cedric gets here, why don't you just tell him 188 00:08:00,837 --> 00:08:03,086 that I slipped in the tub and I broke my ankle. 189 00:08:03,153 --> 00:08:04,686 It's just a date. 190 00:08:04,753 --> 00:08:06,686 It does not have to end with a picket fence 191 00:08:06,753 --> 00:08:09,086 and a freakin' dog in your backyard, alright? 192 00:08:09,153 --> 00:08:10,320 Come on. 193 00:08:10,386 --> 00:08:12,320 For once in your life, loosen up. 194 00:08:12,386 --> 00:08:14,420 Relax. Have some fun. 195 00:08:16,486 --> 00:08:18,753 Well, my head hurts and I gotta vomit. 196 00:08:20,220 --> 00:08:21,540 Alright, I'll get you some aspirin 197 00:08:21,564 --> 00:08:23,397 and a bucket, you big sissy. 198 00:08:24,486 --> 00:08:25,986 Come on, honey, now you sit down. 199 00:08:26,053 --> 00:08:28,153 It's okay. You sit down. 200 00:08:28,220 --> 00:08:29,386 Now, look. 201 00:08:29,453 --> 00:08:32,620 If anybody should be nervous, it's him. 202 00:08:32,686 --> 00:08:35,053 You are Khadijah James. 203 00:08:35,120 --> 00:08:38,553 You are different than any other woman he's ever dated. 204 00:08:40,453 --> 00:08:42,120 That's true. 205 00:08:42,186 --> 00:08:45,286 I'm not 19, I'm not a model and I'm not famous. 206 00:08:46,820 --> 00:08:50,386 Oh, Khadijah. Listen. 207 00:08:50,453 --> 00:08:52,720 Just let nature take its course. 208 00:08:54,486 --> 00:08:56,620 Look at me and Obie, it worked for us. 209 00:08:56,686 --> 00:08:58,920 It took over a year and a half just to get up the nerve 210 00:08:58,986 --> 00:09:00,926 to ask you to the flea market. 211 00:09:02,460 --> 00:09:04,140 Good point, stick your tongue in his throat 212 00:09:04,193 --> 00:09:06,126 the minute you see him, girl. 213 00:09:09,526 --> 00:09:10,726 Alright, how many do you want? 214 00:09:10,750 --> 00:09:11,793 Two will be fine. 215 00:09:11,860 --> 00:09:13,493 [knocking on door] 216 00:09:13,560 --> 00:09:15,226 Okay, give me two more. 217 00:09:15,293 --> 00:09:17,426 Give me four. Come on, hurry now. Hurry up. 218 00:09:18,760 --> 00:09:20,860 Mr. Ceballos. 219 00:09:23,093 --> 00:09:24,760 Well, hello. 220 00:09:24,826 --> 00:09:26,493 I'm Synclaire. Remember me? 221 00:09:26,560 --> 00:09:27,902 Why don't you just come right on in? 222 00:09:27,926 --> 00:09:29,406 Oh, look at me. I can't invite you in. 223 00:09:29,460 --> 00:09:30,593 I don't live here anymore. 224 00:09:30,660 --> 00:09:32,293 But uninviting you in would be rude. 225 00:09:32,360 --> 00:09:34,193 Pretend I was never here. Okay. 226 00:09:35,526 --> 00:09:37,166 ‐ I'm sorry. Forgive me. ‐ That's alright. 227 00:09:37,190 --> 00:09:39,126 I kinda expect that from your friends. 228 00:09:39,193 --> 00:09:41,926 Oh, so then you must remember Max and Regine. 229 00:09:41,993 --> 00:09:43,713 We're getting late, Antonio's not gonna hold 230 00:09:43,737 --> 00:09:45,670 those reservations, come on. 231 00:09:47,360 --> 00:09:49,293 [laughing] 232 00:09:52,226 --> 00:09:55,293 Hey, umm, wh‐wh‐what are you doin' with that bottle? 233 00:09:55,360 --> 00:09:57,326 Well, I was going to get the aspirin 234 00:09:57,393 --> 00:09:59,960 but this one said "For Regine's professional use only" 235 00:10:00,026 --> 00:10:02,200 so I figured that this was the good stuff.. 236 00:10:02,266 --> 00:10:04,066 That you were holdin' out for yourself. 237 00:10:05,466 --> 00:10:08,366 Max, I keep my herbal tranquilizers in that bottle. 238 00:10:10,000 --> 00:10:11,866 Tranquillizers. 239 00:10:11,933 --> 00:10:13,666 I offer them to my brides. 240 00:10:13,733 --> 00:10:14,866 Half if they're nervous 241 00:10:14,933 --> 00:10:16,866 and a whole one if their husbands are ugly. 242 00:10:18,666 --> 00:10:21,266 I just gave Khadijah four ugly husbands' worth. 243 00:10:22,666 --> 00:10:25,300 Ow, girl, why didn't you just knock the girl 244 00:10:25,366 --> 00:10:27,266 on the head with a baseball bat? 245 00:10:27,333 --> 00:10:29,033 We better get to that restaurant. 246 00:10:29,100 --> 00:10:31,066 [mumbling] 247 00:10:32,366 --> 00:10:33,566 Where you goin'? 248 00:10:33,633 --> 00:10:36,166 Oh, you don't expect me to go to Antonio's 249 00:10:36,233 --> 00:10:38,166 wearin' these rags, do you? 250 00:10:42,800 --> 00:10:45,266 [harp music] 251 00:10:45,333 --> 00:10:47,053 I can't believe I'm sittin' across the table 252 00:10:47,077 --> 00:10:50,466 from Khadijah James and she's not scribblin' on her notepad. 253 00:10:50,533 --> 00:10:51,933 Well, how do you know I'm not hidin' 254 00:10:51,957 --> 00:10:54,500 a tape recorder somewhere? 255 00:10:54,566 --> 00:10:56,966 I see somebody tryin' to get their flirt on. 256 00:10:57,033 --> 00:10:58,333 Well. Hey. 257 00:10:58,400 --> 00:11:01,540 You know, all work and no play makes Khadijah.. 258 00:11:04,406 --> 00:11:06,206 Wow! 259 00:11:10,540 --> 00:11:13,306 Did somebody dim the lights in here? 260 00:11:13,373 --> 00:11:16,173 Hmm, I don't think so. Are you alright? 261 00:11:16,240 --> 00:11:18,840 Mm, maybe I just need some food. 262 00:11:20,973 --> 00:11:22,906 How about a toast? 263 00:11:24,540 --> 00:11:28,406 To Ced, and of course to.. 264 00:11:30,040 --> 00:11:31,406 Umm.. 265 00:11:32,906 --> 00:11:35,773 Hey, that's funny I can't remember my name. 266 00:11:37,473 --> 00:11:40,940 ‐ Yeah. ‐ Good evening, name please. 267 00:11:41,006 --> 00:11:42,673 Oops. 268 00:11:45,373 --> 00:11:46,606 Thank you. 269 00:11:46,673 --> 00:11:48,606 Yes, we are joining the Kitsan party. 270 00:11:48,673 --> 00:11:50,173 [whispering] Kitsan, Kitsan. 271 00:11:50,240 --> 00:11:52,740 Right this way. 272 00:11:52,806 --> 00:11:56,340 Alright. Smooth move, you've done this before, haven't you? 273 00:11:56,406 --> 00:11:59,073 Oh, Chuck E. Cheese. Private party. I was six. 274 00:12:00,613 --> 00:12:03,013 Your table, ladies. 275 00:12:03,080 --> 00:12:05,546 [speaking in foreign language] 276 00:12:05,613 --> 00:12:09,046 Oh. This is great. 277 00:12:09,113 --> 00:12:11,113 Girl, where the hell did you pick that up from? 278 00:12:11,180 --> 00:12:14,246 Baby Hannah's private party. I was twelve. 279 00:12:14,313 --> 00:12:16,446 My doctor said my left foot 280 00:12:16,513 --> 00:12:18,513 is bigger than my right foot. 281 00:12:18,580 --> 00:12:20,913 Right? See? Now feet big. 282 00:12:20,980 --> 00:12:23,346 Why are my shoes the same size? 283 00:12:24,246 --> 00:12:27,013 You see what I'm sayin'? 284 00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:28,913 [cell phone ringing] 285 00:12:28,980 --> 00:12:30,146 Your purse. 286 00:12:30,213 --> 00:12:32,780 Oh, man, listen.. 287 00:12:34,913 --> 00:12:36,880 Hello, I'm at dinner. 288 00:12:36,946 --> 00:12:38,480 (Max) 'Khadijah, it's Max.' 289 00:12:38,546 --> 00:12:40,980 Get your butt in the coat room. We've gotta talk to you. 290 00:12:41,046 --> 00:12:43,780 Okay. 291 00:12:43,846 --> 00:12:46,380 Okay, look, I gotta go talk to the coat. 292 00:12:47,546 --> 00:12:50,080 Ced, will you just watch my shoes, okay? 293 00:12:53,480 --> 00:12:56,146 Hello, lady, your hair look nice like that. 294 00:13:01,186 --> 00:13:04,486 Now, you know that's nasty. I could tell by the way you eat. 295 00:13:04,553 --> 00:13:06,686 You're hardly eating. 296 00:13:09,253 --> 00:13:10,886 Okay. 297 00:13:10,953 --> 00:13:13,686 ‐ Oh, Khadijah. ‐ Oh, my God. 298 00:13:13,753 --> 00:13:14,886 Wait, no, hold up. 299 00:13:14,953 --> 00:13:16,186 Now, they could've got y'all 300 00:13:16,253 --> 00:13:18,486 a better table than this. 301 00:13:18,553 --> 00:13:20,033 Alright, Khadijah, Khadijah, Khadijah. 302 00:13:20,057 --> 00:13:21,486 Listen, I have to tell you something 303 00:13:21,553 --> 00:13:24,486 and I want to preface this by saying. 304 00:13:24,553 --> 00:13:27,286 Regine didn't mean to hurt you. 305 00:13:28,386 --> 00:13:31,853 ‐ Khadijah, Max drugged you. ‐ No‐‐ 306 00:13:31,920 --> 00:13:32,853 ‐ She.. Shut up. ‐ Okay. 307 00:13:32,920 --> 00:13:36,120 She gave you tranquillizers. 308 00:13:36,186 --> 00:13:37,466 Okay, you shut your hole, midget. 309 00:13:37,520 --> 00:13:39,753 I mean, it was an accident. It was an accident. 310 00:13:39,820 --> 00:13:42,520 You know tranquillizers, Aspirins. To‐ma‐to, to‐mah‐to. 311 00:13:42,586 --> 00:13:44,286 No, y'all is trippin'. 312 00:13:44,353 --> 00:13:45,453 Oh. 313 00:13:45,520 --> 00:13:47,986 You think I don't know. I know what's up. 314 00:13:48,886 --> 00:13:50,853 I know! 315 00:13:50,920 --> 00:13:52,953 Y'all just tryin' to be jealous. 316 00:13:53,020 --> 00:13:56,453 See, 'cause I'm gettin' the man of your dreams. 317 00:13:56,520 --> 00:13:59,220 Okay, honey, honey, if we were lyin' 318 00:13:59,286 --> 00:14:01,926 why is your size 12 on the table? 319 00:14:07,060 --> 00:14:09,393 Now, see, I'm goin' back over to my table. 320 00:14:09,460 --> 00:14:11,593 Because my man is missin' me. 321 00:14:13,960 --> 00:14:17,960 M‐m‐my m‐m‐man m‐m‐missin' m‐me. 322 00:14:19,493 --> 00:14:22,193 That's a lot of M's in that. 323 00:14:22,260 --> 00:14:23,820 ‐ I like M's. M's.. ‐ O‐o‐okay, hold on. 324 00:14:23,887 --> 00:14:24,887 We should be goin' home. 325 00:14:24,920 --> 00:14:25,826 [clamoring] 326 00:14:25,893 --> 00:14:28,560 Back off y'all. Back off, back off. 327 00:14:28,626 --> 00:14:30,626 Get off of me. 328 00:14:32,960 --> 00:14:35,493 Hey, y'all just stay the hell away from me. 329 00:14:35,560 --> 00:14:38,160 Imma call security. 330 00:14:38,226 --> 00:14:40,160 Security. 331 00:14:42,960 --> 00:14:46,293 Okay. Well, so much for your brilliant plan. 332 00:14:46,360 --> 00:14:49,226 I am going over there and I'm telling Cedric what's goin' on. 333 00:14:49,293 --> 00:14:53,326 Pardon me, Mr. Ceballos did not come to world famous Antonio's 334 00:14:53,393 --> 00:14:56,360 to be harassed by common groupies. 335 00:14:56,426 --> 00:14:59,426 Groupies, uh, th‐there's that word again. 336 00:14:59,493 --> 00:15:02,166 I got your.. Wa‐wa‐wait. 337 00:15:02,233 --> 00:15:04,033 ‐ You don't wanna.. ‐ Oh, wait! Wait a minute. 338 00:15:04,057 --> 00:15:06,490 ‐ You don't wanna do this. ‐ Unhand me, you brute! 339 00:15:07,133 --> 00:15:09,066 I really like that. 340 00:15:11,733 --> 00:15:13,933 Well, I was cold. 341 00:15:17,533 --> 00:15:19,600 Oh, wingtips. Mr. McLay. 342 00:15:19,666 --> 00:15:22,400 Alright, look, bad news is best delivered straight. 343 00:15:22,466 --> 00:15:23,933 Just like whiskey. 344 00:15:24,000 --> 00:15:26,033 Well, what if Mrs. Porchnick was his one true love 345 00:15:26,100 --> 00:15:27,866 and he's travelled here to find her? 346 00:15:27,933 --> 00:15:29,633 What if "no mountains high enough 347 00:15:29,700 --> 00:15:30,866 "no valleys low enough 348 00:15:30,933 --> 00:15:33,900 no rivers wide enough" to keep him away from her, yeah? 349 00:15:33,966 --> 00:15:35,806 What if he touched her in the morning, I mean.. 350 00:15:35,830 --> 00:15:37,566 'What's goin' on here?' 351 00:15:37,633 --> 00:15:40,000 No more Miss Ross before bedtime. Okay? 352 00:15:44,066 --> 00:15:45,666 Hi, Mr. McLay. 353 00:15:45,733 --> 00:15:47,813 My husband, Overton, has something to tell you. Come. 354 00:15:47,837 --> 00:15:49,633 Oh, don't tell me Mary's not here again. 355 00:15:49,700 --> 00:15:51,733 That woman's a, a whirling dervish. 356 00:15:51,800 --> 00:15:53,700 When I got back from World War II 357 00:15:53,766 --> 00:15:55,800 it was months before I found her. 358 00:15:55,866 --> 00:15:57,466 Oh, oh, so you were in the big one, huh? 359 00:15:57,533 --> 00:15:58,533 ‐ Yes. ‐ Yeah. 360 00:15:58,566 --> 00:16:00,006 I‐I bet you learned to look death 361 00:16:00,073 --> 00:16:01,406 right in the eye and laugh at it. 362 00:16:01,473 --> 00:16:02,706 ‐ Ha! ‐ Never. 363 00:16:02,773 --> 00:16:06,273 Each loss is much more painful than the last. 364 00:16:06,340 --> 00:16:10,106 Umm, well, Mrs. Porchnick'll be back in the mornin'. Eh‐eh.. 365 00:16:10,173 --> 00:16:12,006 Oh, my God, that‐that woman's 366 00:16:12,073 --> 00:16:14,373 harder to trace down than a ghost. 367 00:16:14,440 --> 00:16:17,306 N‐n‐now you're gettin' it. 368 00:16:17,373 --> 00:16:21,106 Overton, if I fumble and you fumble 369 00:16:21,173 --> 00:16:23,573 who picks up the ball? 370 00:16:23,640 --> 00:16:25,673 I guess we're gonna have to have some kids, baby. 371 00:16:25,740 --> 00:16:28,673 We need a few more players on this squad. 372 00:16:31,606 --> 00:16:34,206 My nana used to grate cheese just like that. 373 00:16:37,740 --> 00:16:39,606 Oh, nana. 374 00:16:39,673 --> 00:16:42,373 [sobbing] 375 00:16:42,440 --> 00:16:44,940 Oh, I'm sorry. 376 00:16:45,006 --> 00:16:46,073 When did she pass? 377 00:16:46,140 --> 00:16:48,140 She's not dead, she in Jersey. 378 00:16:50,106 --> 00:16:52,006 Hey, what's wrong? I kill your buzz? 379 00:16:52,073 --> 00:16:53,173 Well, come on. 380 00:16:53,240 --> 00:16:56,673 Come on. Let's dance, Ced‐a‐doodle. 381 00:16:56,740 --> 00:16:58,273 They don't got no dance floor here. 382 00:16:58,340 --> 00:17:01,313 Oh, please. Come on, now. 383 00:17:02,613 --> 00:17:05,446 Excuse me, harp lady. 384 00:17:05,513 --> 00:17:07,613 How about a little Wu Tang? 385 00:17:09,480 --> 00:17:11,413 How about a little Bach? 386 00:17:11,480 --> 00:17:13,813 Okay, kick it. 387 00:17:13,880 --> 00:17:16,813 [harp music] 388 00:17:18,546 --> 00:17:22,446 Khadijah, I think it's time to take you home. 389 00:17:22,513 --> 00:17:24,380 Take me home? 390 00:17:24,446 --> 00:17:26,613 [chuckling] Oh‐oh‐oh, somebody got 391 00:17:26,680 --> 00:17:29,380 a little crush on me, huh. 392 00:17:29,446 --> 00:17:31,213 Somebody need to sober up. 393 00:17:31,280 --> 00:17:33,013 Oh, please. 394 00:17:33,080 --> 00:17:36,680 Big guy like you.. Holdin' your liquor just fine. 395 00:17:44,346 --> 00:17:46,646 Okay, alright, I got it. 396 00:17:46,713 --> 00:17:48,880 What if I dress up like Mrs. Porchnick? 397 00:17:48,946 --> 00:17:50,713 Then Mr. McLay will think that 398 00:17:50,780 --> 00:17:52,980 the woman he loves is still alive. 399 00:17:53,046 --> 00:17:55,313 Now, was her hump on the left or on the right? 400 00:17:56,613 --> 00:17:58,546 Look, baby, we can't run from this forever. 401 00:17:58,613 --> 00:18:01,186 I mean, let's just face the man like two mature adults, okay? 402 00:18:01,253 --> 00:18:02,253 [knock on door] 403 00:18:02,286 --> 00:18:03,786 ‐ That's him. Hide. ‐ Hide. 404 00:18:03,853 --> 00:18:05,286 (Max) 'I know you're in there.' 405 00:18:05,353 --> 00:18:07,720 'Stop sneakin' that freak and come open the door.' 406 00:18:08,686 --> 00:18:11,620 ‐ It's Maxine. ‐ Yeah, thanks. 407 00:18:11,686 --> 00:18:14,053 Khadijah's got a hangover and I gotta get some stuff 408 00:18:14,120 --> 00:18:15,720 to help her out, you know. 409 00:18:20,753 --> 00:18:22,153 Wait a minute, now. 410 00:18:22,220 --> 00:18:24,886 How's all that food gonna help Khadijah's hangover? 411 00:18:24,953 --> 00:18:27,753 I'm much less abrasive when I'm full. 412 00:18:27,820 --> 00:18:29,620 How many people live here? 413 00:18:29,686 --> 00:18:32,853 Uh, where can I find Mary Porchnick? 414 00:18:32,920 --> 00:18:35,153 Got a shovel? 415 00:18:35,220 --> 00:18:37,786 That old prune croaked weeks ago. 416 00:18:37,853 --> 00:18:39,286 Alright, y'all. Thanks for the beef. 417 00:18:39,353 --> 00:18:41,253 (Obie) 'Alright.' 418 00:18:41,320 --> 00:18:42,753 Mary's dead? 419 00:18:42,820 --> 00:18:46,220 Sorry, Mr. McLay. We just didn't know how to tell you. 420 00:18:46,286 --> 00:18:47,953 Woo‐woo‐woo. 421 00:18:49,386 --> 00:18:53,453 Mary's gone on to a fine resting place at Pristine Hills. 422 00:18:53,520 --> 00:18:55,253 Her memory will live on forever. 423 00:18:55,320 --> 00:18:57,686 Oh, to Hades with her memory. 424 00:18:57,753 --> 00:19:01,293 That cheap old bag owes me 500 bucks. 425 00:19:02,760 --> 00:19:03,926 ‐ What? ‐ Yeah. 426 00:19:03,993 --> 00:19:05,260 She, she stiffed me 427 00:19:05,326 --> 00:19:08,360 a‐at a poker game ten years ago. 428 00:19:08,426 --> 00:19:10,793 I‐I'm half a mind to kill myself 429 00:19:10,860 --> 00:19:12,793 and get her on the other side. 430 00:19:16,326 --> 00:19:19,760 Last night was the most humiliatin' night of my life. 431 00:19:19,826 --> 00:19:21,560 Do you think he'll call? 432 00:19:21,626 --> 00:19:23,893 Yeah, sure, girl. I don't see why not. 433 00:19:26,493 --> 00:19:29,460 [chuckles] What world are y'all livin' in? 434 00:19:29,526 --> 00:19:31,960 I mean, that brother is never callin' again. 435 00:19:32,026 --> 00:19:34,160 I mean, I wouldn't be surprised if he hasn't changed 436 00:19:34,226 --> 00:19:36,160 his phone number already. 437 00:19:39,760 --> 00:19:42,593 You are a first‐class pain in the butt. 438 00:19:44,060 --> 00:19:47,026 I mean, ha‐ha‐have you ever heard of a little thing 439 00:19:47,093 --> 00:19:49,260 called sparing someone's feelings? 440 00:19:49,326 --> 00:19:50,993 But, uh, I‐I just did. 441 00:19:51,060 --> 00:19:53,760 I mean, I could've mentioned how he's probably on the phone 442 00:19:53,826 --> 00:19:56,460 right now callin' up all his NBA buddies and tellin' 'em 443 00:19:56,526 --> 00:19:58,793 how Khadijah James do up on the maitre d'. 444 00:20:01,400 --> 00:20:03,933 Well, fine. The truth is leavin' the room. 445 00:20:05,033 --> 00:20:07,400 [groans] 446 00:20:07,466 --> 00:20:09,866 Oh, forget Mars. 447 00:20:09,933 --> 00:20:12,500 That one is from Pluto. 448 00:20:12,566 --> 00:20:14,333 Well, at least he's being straight with me. 449 00:20:14,400 --> 00:20:17,166 If this is what happens when I put myself out there.. 450 00:20:17,233 --> 00:20:19,966 I drink so much, I don't even remember doin' it. 451 00:20:21,300 --> 00:20:22,300 Well, no more. 452 00:20:22,333 --> 00:20:23,833 Hey, cut yourself a break, girl. 453 00:20:23,900 --> 00:20:25,433 You didn't drink anything. 454 00:20:25,500 --> 00:20:28,233 It was those tranquillizers that did you in. 455 00:20:28,300 --> 00:20:29,666 What tranquillizers? 456 00:20:31,366 --> 00:20:32,900 [grunts] 457 00:20:35,833 --> 00:20:38,933 You're right, girl. You were pretty drunk. 458 00:20:41,500 --> 00:20:42,966 Oh, hold up, hold up. 459 00:20:43,033 --> 00:20:44,800 It's all comin' back to me now. 460 00:20:44,866 --> 00:20:47,233 That was your face under the raccoon coat. 461 00:20:47,300 --> 00:20:48,800 Y'all drugged me. 462 00:20:50,800 --> 00:20:52,666 Is that really relevant? 463 00:20:54,000 --> 00:20:55,466 The important thing is.. 464 00:20:55,533 --> 00:20:58,333 Is that you're back in the dating game. 465 00:20:58,400 --> 00:20:59,466 Okay? 466 00:20:59,533 --> 00:21:02,073 Oh, I'm gettin' into it, just without your help. 467 00:21:02,140 --> 00:21:04,273 Because for a few minutes last night 468 00:21:04,340 --> 00:21:06,606 before the headache and the sweating 469 00:21:06,673 --> 00:21:10,773 and the sudden coma, I was really into it. 470 00:21:10,840 --> 00:21:12,840 I mean, that boy was cute. 471 00:21:12,906 --> 00:21:14,773 Khadijah, is there anything 472 00:21:14,840 --> 00:21:17,640 anything Max can do to make this up to you? 473 00:21:18,606 --> 00:21:19,606 Yeah. 474 00:21:19,673 --> 00:21:22,406 You can call Cedric and explain everything. 475 00:21:22,473 --> 00:21:24,640 Maybe at least I can get my dignity back. 476 00:21:25,973 --> 00:21:27,606 And maybe another date. 477 00:21:27,673 --> 00:21:30,240 (Trip) 'That's a big, fat maybe!' 478 00:21:33,540 --> 00:21:35,640 Okay, we gotta teach that brother how to lie. 479 00:21:40,873 --> 00:21:41,873 Now, hold on. 480 00:21:41,940 --> 00:21:43,906 Just take it easy on Mrs. Porchnick. 481 00:21:43,973 --> 00:21:46,640 It's not easy to keep a house cheery when you luggin' around 482 00:21:46,706 --> 00:21:47,773 a oxygen tank. 483 00:21:47,840 --> 00:21:49,773 Come on, lighten up on Mrs. Porchnick. 484 00:21:49,840 --> 00:21:51,606 It's not easy to keep a house cheery 485 00:21:51,673 --> 00:21:53,573 when the Grim Reaper's at your doorstep. 486 00:21:53,640 --> 00:21:55,973 Come on now, don't‐don't crack on Mrs. Porchnick. 487 00:21:56,040 --> 00:21:57,840 It's not easy to keep a house cheery 488 00:21:57,906 --> 00:21:59,780 when you're fallin' and you can't get up. 489 00:21:59,846 --> 00:22:01,813 Hey, don't crack on Mrs. Porchnick. 490 00:22:01,880 --> 00:22:03,346 Kinda hard keepin' the house cheery 491 00:22:03,413 --> 00:22:05,380 when you hooked up to a iron lung. 492 00:22:07,046 --> 00:22:08,486 Y'all‐y'all got to give me some love. 493 00:22:08,546 --> 00:22:11,013 Hey, I got the bat. 494 00:22:11,080 --> 00:22:12,680 (female ♫1) Woo‐hoo!